Feel JOY again: use your senses

Music, smells, colours, air quality, hydration. It all plays a role in our mood and the marketers know it. They have studied the effect of every detail inside a retail shop to increase the odds of selling their products. The bottom line: the better you make your customer feel in the shop, the higher the chance they'll want to get something from it to remember this 'Feel Good' sensation.

We can use the same principle to cheer up from the post-Dday misery. Infidelity really sucks and affects so many compartments in our life. The end-of-year celebrations - or lack of - take a whole new meaning after infidelity is discovered or disclosed.

This year will be my second end-of-year post-Dday and I am a much stronger version than I was twelve months ago. I no longer feel the need to soothe my pain daily by spending hours reading, listening or watching content about love, relationships or infidelity. Finally, the last two months or so, life has started to feel like 'It Goes On' again.

I'm writing this not to brag about my progress but with the intention to give hope to those who are not there yet. It IS possible to feel less pain as time passes by and you consciously work on recovering from the devastating effects of betrayal by your spouse or long-term life partner.

I know that if you are reading this, you are actively working on your healing. Here are some strategies you can add to your daily or weekly routine to cheer up through your senses:

• Scented candles are perfect in the cooler months. Lavender has soothing effects
• Play music that takes you back in time, to happier times like teenagehood or earlier
• Sound is energy created as vibrations create waves. Tune into the right frequency for a better mood: use baroque music to relax or carols to get into the Christmas spirit if you wish
• Control how much light there is in your room, dimmer light favours relaxation
• Colours also vary in frequency. You can change or cover the screen of a lamp to create a new ambience
• Make sure the temperature is comfortable to allow your muscles to relax
• Breathe consciously to ensure there is enough air entering your lungs
• Stay hydrated and cheer up with a bottle of the best mineral water available
• Listen to your body: have a nap instead of a coffee if you feel sleepy and you can do it
• Watch a program that relaxes you: stand up comedy or science fiction depending on your taste

I hope you can start implementing some of the above today. They are simple and they HELP. Sometimes all we need is a kind reminder. We get so caught up in our (negative) thoughts that we forget to breathe deeply enough and drink water. That can also contribute to a sad mood. 

Do you have any suggestions? What works best for you? Let me know in the comments. 

Be kind to yourself. 

Love, 

Helen